"It has beeen said that the love of money is the root of all evil. The want of money is so quite as truly."
"I consider being ill as one of the great pleasures of life, provided one is not too ill."
"It does not matter much what a man hates provided he hates something."
"If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue."
"Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them."
"Men should not try to overstrain their goodness more than any other faculty."
"Life is like playing the violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on."
"Logic is like the sword: those who appeal to it shall perish by it."
"An apology for the devil: it must be remembered that we have heard one side of the case. God has written all the books."
"Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well."
"Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on."
"The difference between God and the historians consists above all in the fact that God cannot alter the past."
"It has been said that the love of money is the root of all evil. The want of money is so quite as truly."
"If we attend continually and promptly to the little that we can do, we shall ere long be surprised to find how little remains that we cannot do."
"Then he saw also that it matters little what profession, whether of religion or irreligion, a man may make, provided only he follows it out with charitable inconsistency, and without insisting on it to the bitter end. It is in the uncompromisingness with which dogma is held and not in the dogma or want of dogma that the danger lies."
"He has spent his life best who has enjoyed it most; God will take care that we do not enjoy it any more than is good for us."
"The best liar is he who makes the smallest amount of lying go the longest way."
"The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore."
"An apology for the devil: it must be remembered that we have heard only one side of the case; God has written all the books."
"When you have told anyone you have left him a legacy the only decent thing to do is to die at once."
"Man, unlike the animals, has never learned that the sole purpose of life is to enjoy it."
"Genius might be described as a supreme capacity for getting its possessors into trouble of all kinds."
"All animals except man know that the ultimate of life is to enjoy it."
"All philosophies, if you ride them, are nonsense, but some are greater nonsense than others."
"Logic is like the sword--those who appeal to it shall perish by it."
"I do not mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy."
"It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all."
"Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature."
"All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income."
"The three most important parts a man has are, briefly, his private parts, his money and his religious beliefs."
"All progress is based on a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income."
"People care more about being thought to have taste than about being good, clever, or amiable."
"The voice of the Lord is the voice of common sense, which is shared by all that is"